Santa and the bird cage

Some of the projects I’m currently working on:

What’s this guy doing here???

(Yes…I know, it’s June.)

I like to work about six months ahead. (I’m also making Christmas and New Year’s jewelry, and Christmas decorations, gift boxes and cards.)

So he’s not so early, after all.

This is an old Christmas decoration, a plastic Santa that used to have a red, flocked velvet-like coat. Over the years, it faded unevenly here and there, and bits of it cracked and fell off. It was almost likable in the shabbiest chic sort of way…but…not really. Santa had a bad case of mange.

This was not a Santa who would give you big, shiny presents. This was a Santa that had fallen on hard times. This was a Santa who left IOU’s and coupons clipped from waiting room magazines, and swiped your stockings because he needed new socks.

So I threw it away.

But I had second thoughts. If the coat hadn’t been so shabby, I would have kept it.

Then I remembered: I’m an artist. I own glue.

I have the technology. I can rebuild him.

Fortunately, during the twenty minutes that Old Saint Nick sat in the trash, no one threw away a gallon of bacon grease or any six-week-old marinara, so retrieving him was not a big deal.

So here he is, coatless. (Greaseless, sauceless and acceptably clean.)

I’m not going to redo the flocking. He’s going to get a shinier, perhaps even beadier, coat this time. Santa wants Bling.

Project number two: I saw this bird cage in a friend’s garage, and asked if I could have it. Most people would look at it and think, “bird cage.” I saw it and thought, “LARGE wire frame to wrap beads around.”

Then, for a few moments, I had second thoughts. An old, used bird cage…eewww…gross.

But this is not a real bird cage. There is no door. There’s no perch. There’s no little mirror, no wire hooks for attaching a water bottle or a seed tray. But most importantly…the gaps between the bars are so wide that even large birds could easily escape. A fully-grown eagle could be out of there in about two seconds, presuming you could cram one in without losing a hand.

Unless, for some reason, it decided to humor you and stay in voluntarily, just to be polite.

The interesting thing about this cage is, any bird or animal too big to get out would be too big to put in there in the first place. Anything small enough to be put in…would be small enough to easily escape.

I suspect this cage was used as some kind of decoration (perhaps a fake bird once resided therein) or as a plant hanger. Ivy would look nice, dangling down around the sides, and climbing up the bars. It’s a little rusty, so it may have hung outside, but it’s otherwise clean.

Wonder how they got a flower pot inside? Did this cage once imprison a Chia pet?

I’m afraid the gold color will come off if I give it the Brillo treatment, but I don’t want the rust. Maybe I’ll go light on the scrubbing. Or maybe I’ll paint it after I clean it up.

And after that, it will get a shinier, perhaps even beadier, coat.

Birdie wants Bling.